Monkey Parlor

… where the monkey ponders about bananas and world domination …

Profiling With Google

with one comment

So, I came across this site last night. If you haven’t seen it, you have to check it out. The basic idea is to profile a group of people based on the top results from Google. Results are extremely funny. Accurate or not it does expose some of the stereoptypical views we hold. Being a geek, I can’t help but to wonder what more can Google can tell us about our human nature. So, I stayed up and wrote a little script myself to test it out. Instead of doing the top 15 and allowing only a group of people, I made it so that the script will respond based on the top 40 results of a particular thing or group searched on Google. Here are some of the more interesting results (unedited, take notes of nonsense due to lack of polish in my code; I’ve also highlighted some of the most “interesting” responses):

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watcha wanna noe?
…>Paris Hilton
Paris Hilton is known for her socialite ways, fashion, and boyfriends, Monica will always be known for that particular scandal.
Paris Hilton is known for her hard-partying ways.
Paris Hilton is known for many things from perfume and tiny dogs to reality TV and her signature line, “That’s hot!
Paris Hilton is known for anything but her music, and her debut album “Paris is Burning” is still in the making.
Paris Hilton is known for pulling things off (mainly clothing and scams to steal her friends boyfriends), but the shades she wore to Mekhi Phifer’s .
Paris Hilton is known for her blue eyes which look natural, even in close ups.
Paris Hilton is known for her elegant fashion statements.
Paris Hilton is known for driving across America with her friend Nicole, raising hell wherever they .
Paris Hilton is known for anything .
Paris Hilton is known for is showing up at every .
Paris Hilton is known for three things: her new tv show “The Simple Life,” getting trashed out in public, and her hardcore homemade porno.
Paris Hilton is known for three things: her new tv show “The Simple Life,” getting Three years later, Rick had the video tape stolen and it was sold on the .
Paris Hilton is known for three things: her new tv show “The Simple Life .
PARIS HILTON is known for the plethera of slutty outfits that she likes to wear.
Paris Hilton is known for three things: her new TV show “The Simple Life”, getting trashed out in public, and her hardcore homemade porno!
Paris Hilton is known for being over-the-top, but one area that she falls short on is her choice of tiaras.
Paris Hilton is known for three things: her new tv .
Paris Hilton is known for being a high society party girl, part time model and actress.
Paris Hilton is known for her hard-partying ways paris hilton video.
Paris Hilton is known for doing, all the stuff that royalty is known for doing, all the things that any famous person is known for doing .

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watcha wanna noe?
…>gays
Gays are known for being neat and tidy!
gays are known for this sort of self-centered sensitivity, and they’re also known for using the law to throw expensive tantrums when .
Gays are known for their international nature.
gays are known for their creativity, making them excel as beauticians, clothes designer and fashion models, among others.
gays are known for being open about their sexual orientation, they do all the things that is expected of them and they appear to be happy.
gays are known for their fashion sense.
gays are known for having a lot of relationships and spreading stds like wild fire.
Gays are known for their hatred and violence!
gays are known for their wit and ability to laugh at themselves.
gays are known for being neat and tidy.
gays are known for: a .
Gays are known for being subversive and sneaky and they might entrap you or your children in their lifestyle before you can even say “Pat Robertson.
gays are known for being gay) and it’s too late for them to do anything about it now.

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watcha wanna noe?
…>Politicians
Politicians are known for doublespeak, but rarely are they so blatant as to try to collaborate with countries or cultures they have previously denounced.
politicians are known for ‘saying one thing and doing another,’ voters often do not feel compelled to bother voting.
Politicians are known for these kind of morchas, whether it is any happy moment or it is sad, they will be standing around the corner with bunch of people .
Politicians are known for protecting the interests of larger corporations due to the fact that these same corporations make donations and fund campaigns of .
Politicians are known for talking about 9/11 and gloom and doom, and I like to infuse people with visions of the future and space.
politicians are known for making speeches, not for listening.
politicians are known for tough-guy roles and can campaign almost the same way they auditioned.
Politicians are known for raising the hopes of people and then disappointing them after they take office;
Politicians are known for talking a lot without having a lot to say, and often-times what they do say sounds downright ridiculous.
Politicians are known for saying one thing and doing another.
politicians are known for saying whatever it takes to win over a crowd or sway a voter, Bush’s vernacular is consistently simple, even when he’s on .
politicians are known for having a knack for publicly saying all the right things, at the Boston Convention and Exhibition Center on the South End .
politicians are known for their industry and honesty.
Politicians are known for giving non-answers and it seems that few reporters are willing to push them to give straight answers, perhaps afraid of risking .
politicians are known for reasons other than their politics.
Politicians are known for talking a lot without saying much, and now, More Political Babble reinforces their ridiculous statements.
politicians are known for quick repartees.
politicians are known for marching to a different beat than those on the Sacramento side of the river.
Politicians are known for doing stupid things if they are conservatives.
politicians are known for patronising Lavni dancers.
politicians are known for their excessive cruelty, scandals OR true love toward ALL – the poorest ones as much as all outside religious or cultural groups.
Politicians are known for trying to protect their home turf.
politicians are known for breaking promises, not keeping them.
Politicians are known for frequently changing their statements on issues.
Politicians are known for getting out the vote.
Politicians are known for persuading people.
politicians are known for their careful rhetoric, Nakano is surprisingly blunt.
politicians are known for fudging budgets, tricking voters and even stealing jewelry.
politicians are known for wanting to have it both ways.
politicians are known for their emotions or gut sense, not for their intellect.
POLITICIANS are known for their rambling mouths.
Politicians are known for that.
politicians are known for making dubious statements to leave a room for re-interpretation of the same statement in light of new evidence.
Politicians are known for their ability to manoeuvre based on their circumstances, and hence, whatever they say should be dealt with carefully,” he said.
politicians are known for always telling it like it is.
Politicians are known for kissing babies for photo ops, but Mexican President Vicente Fox takes it a step further by personally providing an oral vaccine to .

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watcha wanna noe?
…>bush
Bush are known for getting caught for underage drinking in bars;
Bush are known for their loyalty;
Bush are known for seeking out and meeting with families of those killed on 9/11, in Afghanistan and in Iraq, .
bush are known for their medicinal benefits.
Bush are known for their social conservatism, tax cuts, and increased military spending.
Bush are known for their guts.
Bush is known for flashes of prickly humor, such as describing Democratic vice presidential nominee Geraldine Ferraro in 1984 as a word that “rhymes .
Bush is known for his light-hearted sense of humor and on-air high jinks with celebrity interviewees.
Bush is known for his habit of giving everybody around him nicknames, often nasty ones.

Bush is known for his sense of humor,” said Ms.
Bush is known for liking bold, sometimes even risky, .
Bush is known for only one thing, it is this;
Bush is known for his business-like foreign trips unlike his predecessor Bill Clinton whose trips were full of colourful photo opportunities.
Bush is known for his ability to build consensus between Republicans and Democrats.
Bush is known for his skill in jollying a meeting along by giving participants a nickname, such as “Mr Landslide” for Tony Blair or “Balloonfoot” for .
Bush is known for his lack of intrinsic ethos.
Bush is known for his “straight talk,” but he just threw a curve – a flip-flop, actually.
Bush is known for playing hardball with anyone who crosses him.
Bush is known for her leadership in a courthouse-preservation project in Texas and in a White House initiative, .
Bush is known for giving his personal associates nicknames, Bush frequently uses “The Almighty” when referring to his personal Friend .
Bush is known for never admitting his mistakes.
Bush is known for signing into law the Americans with Disabilities Act and the Clean Air Act, and for landmark civil rights and environmental legislation.
Bush is known for getting early nights.
Bush is known for personally writing notes to friends and financial backers.
Bush is known for dispensing nicknames — even to people he has just met — but Schwartzman said he didn’t come away from the White House with a .
Bush is known for writing songs dealing with controversial topics such as incest,nuclear war,and gay relationships. (Notice there are a lot of Bushes out there, like Bush the band.. but funny nonetheless)
Bush is known for placing a strong emphasis on loyalty, and Miers certainly appears to be loyal if nothing else.
Bush is known for taking a position and sticking with it, no matter how heated the opposition.
Bush is known for his “straight talk,” but he just threw a curve — a flip-flop, actually.
Bush is known for never admitting his mistakes.
Bush is known for daily White House prayer meetings, nationwide presidential prayer groups, and frequent use of the Bible in the Oval Office.
Bush is known for being “on message,” probably because President Clinton was far more free-wheeling.
Bush is known for liking to keep his team intact through thick and thin, but it looks as if in Mr Tenet’s case he was prepared to make an exception.
Bush is known for his “pickin’ ‘n’ grinnin” performances.
Bush is known for sticking to his guns and most of us admire that.
Bush is known for claiming the programs of others when he was sure they were slam-dunks, stonewalling and spinning his administrative scandals .
Bush is known for his frank opinions on China, whom he has even called the evil force at one time.
Bush is known for is the tax cut, and Democrats don’t want to touch it because it’s a political loser for them, so that puts them in a bind,” .
Bush is known for his preference for such an initiative but there must be some doubts as to whether the US could afford any further tax give backs .
Bush is known for his straight talk, laced with humor and teasing.
Bush is known for “seeing things in black and white, as absolutes”.

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watcha wanna noe?
…>Jennifer Lopez
Jennifer Lopez are known for their “big” bottoms.
Jennifer Lopez is known for her generous buttocks,
Jennifer Lopez is known for her music,
Jennifer Lopez is known for being a huge bitch,
Jennifer Lopez is known for his Philbin impersonation,
Jennifer Lopez is known for her high energy dances,

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watcha wanna noe?
…>women
Women are known for terrible packing skills;
women are known for the long black jackets that are adorned with pom-pom like red trim.
Women are known for juggling many tasks at the same time and still producing excellent results.
women are known for bringing each other down.
women are known for their expertise in making artistic ceremonial costumes.
women are known for their thick, long, lush hair.
women are known for things that shocked the women’s world in history.
Women are known for their listening skills, which explains why both men and women prefer to self-disclose to women.
women are known for their beauty.
women are known for anything BUT their gigantic breasts.
women are known for their unique ability to build interpersonal relationships through talking and listening.
Women are known for this.
women are known for being well-educated and powerful within the family.
women are known for their achievements.
women are known for their patience and tolerance, American women are more famous for stating their opinions – and not taking any sh*t!
women are known for their family values, dependability, and great looks.
women are known for living.
women are known for their active participation in the social, economic, cultural and political life of the state.
Women are known for creativity.
women are known for their brightly colored clothes, their gold, copper or silver nose rings, and henna tattoos that resemble diamond necklaces.
women are known for doing their homework because they know initially people will assume that they are not prepared.
women are known for their peace-making activities, whether it is South Africa or finding the language of conciliation .
women are known for spinning hemp into yarn.
women are known for flamboyant .
women are known for their attendance at just about ANY hockey match.
women are known for their fine cotton weaving of clothing, blankets, and shoulderbags.
women are known for their skill in weaving, as in other crafts.
women are known for, but she had many, many good qualities .
women are known for their praying.
women are known for their loyalty, for being affectionate, caring, very family-oriented, having great patience, and are very forgiving .
women are known for being strong,” said Batool Mohammed-Sayid, 35, whose husband was killed in the 1991 Gulf War by a US missile, leaving her to .
women are known for their ability to survive in the face of adversity and to retain their dignity, as well as their sense of humor, in the hardest .
women are known for their attractive dress and hairstyles.
women are known for saying what they have on their mind.
women is known for her book Life Among the Piutes?
Women is known for its commitment to improving the lives of women in poverty, advancing women’s equality and human .
women is known for its fierceness in combat.
women is known for clothing that provides function and still encompasses the rules of fashion.
Women is known for raising the banner of the Republican Party, by raising campaign funds as well as candidates.
women is known for her odd behaviors and personality.
Women is known for its quirky sense of style (dressing up in women’s clothing) and original instrument choices (mostly cleaning equipment).
women is known for her comedic ability, leaving us with the not entirely unpleasant task of watching them go through the motions.
women is known for filing many lawsuits against fast food restaurants.
women is known for her notorious onslaught against islam, she causes nothing but trouble and fitnah in the muslim community.
women is known for “artistic accomplishment.
Women is Known for Her Faithfulness towards her companion, She is also Quoted as the pillar of strength for She has always stood by her Loved Ones in .
WOMEN IS KNOWN FOR HER KINDNESS AND MERCYFULNESS.
Women is known for high academic.
women is known for their .
women Is known for his whispy and beautiful illustrations .
women is known for produce that sexiest bedroom around the whole world, & like many French women, current housewives frequently project in sex .
women is known for his fighting in the area.
women is known for make the most aphrodisiacal bedroom in the whole world, and like many Gallic women, todays homemakers typically design in sex .

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watcha wanna noe?
…>google
Google are known for their softly softly approach to taking over markets.
Google are known for their Lava Lamps, but what isn’t known is that each Google lava lamp contains a small microphone and hidden .
Google are known for testing stuff fairly randomly, I don’t often actually visit the google home page, so it’s possible .
Google are known for serving inappropriaet adverts, which is why I personally would not use them, but the owners of Eve-Tanking have NOT chosen to .
Google are known for slipping in special numbers and such everywhere, but they wont joke around with someone’s earnings.
Google are known for innovating, Microsoft generally aren’t (besides visual studio perhaps).
Google is known for” brought me to The Prejudice Map.
Google is Known For Interesting Applications”.
Google is known for thinking big.
Google is known for innovative recruitment methods and the high status in which it holds academic and mathematically skilled workers.
Google is known for it’s highly tuned process of selecting hardware components (ie all those thousands .
Google is known for being an ok search engine by the majority of the world, but saying everything Google put’s it’s name on is going to be a success it .
Google is known for offering increasingly novel benefits to its employees.
Google is known for frequently changing its ranking methods, largely in an attempt to foil people who seek to manipulate its system with new tricks to .
Google is known for its from-the-hip style of innovation.
Google is known for having the most simple interface in Web search history: a logo, a search form, and that’s about it.
Google is known for its Integrity.
Google is known for their April Fool’s jokes – always beware on that day.
Google is known for reinventing the wheel in general, they don’t copy ideas of rival companies;
Google is known for more relevant search returns, Google is not infallible.
Google is known for their “beta” services, but every now and then they remove the label to signify .
google is known for sending emails randomly.
Google is known for it’s un-predictability or atleast it was and let us if Google’s reputation is kept high this year.
Google is known for it’s highly tuned process of selecting hardware components (ie all those thousands of computers .
Google is known for is needed to moneterize underutilized inventory and .
Google is known for its ability to pull highly relevant Web sites to the top of the search results list.
Google is known for throwing things out there [in test mode], but usually when they do, it’s something no one else is doing or it’s something that takes to .
Google is known for the relevancy of its search results, but you don’t need to go very far down the rankings before you start finding non-relevant results .
Google is known for mastering a model to get the most performance out of a computer system for the least amount of money.
Google is known for supporting AdSense publishers.
Google is known for its Wild West approach to its products, rolling out everything from enterprise search tools to music services seemingly overnight.
Google is known for being outside of the usual when it comes to even the oddest of tech firms.
Google is known for their short text-based ads.
Google is known for providing great benefits including free breakfast, lunch and dinner at headquarters provided by gourmet chefs.
Google is known for it ranking and relevance features.
Google is known for its “push” advertising based on your information provided.
Google is known for throwing things out there (in test mode), but usually when they do, it’s something no one else is doing or it’s something that takes to .
Google is known for having the same attitude — that’s one of the reasons we’re so excited to be working with them.
Google is known for its search engine.
Google is known for more relevant search returns, Google is not infallible.
Google is known for taking the spotlight on many occasions, both in the search engi.
Google is known for its ‘dance’ when it shuffles results about once a month.

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Written by divi

21/06/2006 at 5:29 am

Posted in Google, Internet, Silly, Useful

One Response

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  1. Interesting test.
    autonews

    autonews

    25/06/2006 at 5:54 am


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